Share your real life creepypastas

[agrippamaxentius]

 So, laugh if you will but this story still brings a tear to my eye and is somewhat troubling, again I ask you share your real life "Scary Stories" irrregardless of whether or not you think they belong here. I find these to be pretty entertaining so i'll share my creepiest experience "Since then ive moved to NYC so ive had much creepier experiences but never at such a vulnerable age"


The Grey Man

When I was 11 years old I had just moved from Florida to Long Island NY, my parents business had gone bankrupt and this was the only opportunity for my family to make any money.  Being a member of grogheads im sure you realize that I underwent a degree of bullying xD but this is irrelevant to the following tale.  When I moved to Long Island NY me and my family moved to an apartment complex, it was circular with a security gate, and this security gate wasn't staffed by a security guard, it was a sort of "mock gate" there was a keypad but any combination including 4 digits would assure you entry.

  At this age South Park had just come out, somehow despite the utter lack of snow "Except for a few days during winter"  me and my friends became obsessed with hockey, the way young kids get obsessed with anything, a total and utter obsession. There was a problem though, me and my best friend "Ta, ive changed the name to hide identity but his parents were Hindu, he's a friend to this day" loved the "Street Hockey" obsession that rose up in our tiny apartment complex, but neither of us owned "Rollerblades". Nonetheless anyone was allowed in, rollerblades were optional and despite me and Ta lacking any we scored quite a few goals and were for a short time the "Sidewalk Wayne Gretzkys" of our neighborhood xD.

One day we had a great game, me and Ta had our sticks over our shoulders, our frames were tiny and I remember even back then that carrying a hockey stick was reminiscent of carrying a polearm xD.  We decided to go over to my house and play "Starfox" on my N64, the way this complex was built was an oval shape, within the center there was a playground/parking lot which is where we all played since our parents were busy working. As we came to the street across from my apartment "The outer lower left wall of the complex" a grey car drove directly up to us. A window rolled down and a wirey man in his fifties "grey hair, rimmed glasses" smiled at us and said "Come over here boys". First mistake... we went over.

  The gentleman "and I hesitate to call him that" proceeded to pine over our physique, in retrospect it was pretty creepy. "You boys look so strong for your age, how old are you? You look about 13". I want you to keep in mind that despite the terrible state of the car "An old beaten up grey volvo" for some reason it has tinted windows, it had a few other interesting characteristics but ill come back to that later. At one point I looked at Ta and I think thankfully at that age we had at least a rudimentary understanding that this wasn't the most "Common" situation. Suddenly the man motioned to the back of his car "I notice you boys dont have any rollerblades, why dont you hop in the back? My nephew doesn't need his anymore so just grab the ones back there. Immediately I knew something was wrong, there were  2 of us, how could he possibly have rollerblades in both of our sizes in the first place? Ta was excited, he reached for the car door at once and at that moment I turned into "Child hero" mode. Im sure it looked silly, but as Ta yanked the car door open I grabbed his collar and yanked him back, brandishing my tiny plastic 5$ hockey stick in the same way a knight would brandish a greatsword and explained in my most aggravating tone "My parents said I can't get in the car with strangers" I was terrified, clearly shaking as I contemplated all of the awful things that could happen in this situation.

3 very important things occured in the next 5 seconds.

As Ta opened the door and I yanked him back we saw the backseat... well... the back of the car. There was no backseat, there also weren't any rollerblades. What we did see is a man in his early thirties "To this day he reminds me of Mick Foley, sorry mankind" leaning in next to the rear back door, seated against it. Again, there were no seats, none whatsoever. The man continued to try to coax us into the car and this is when #2 occured. Ta noticed the man, and he noticed us. He looked away and didn't seem remotely interested in us, pretending not to notice. But to this day I don't think for a second that this could have ended in any good way. At this point me and Ta began to slowly move back, my hand on his collar yanking him closer to my apartment, ive read many stories of veterans in combat shitting their pants, I think this is the closest ive ever managed to come to that. I was certain we would be nabbed by the much younger man in the back. I kept my plastic hockey stick elevated just in case, but im sure against an actual attacker it would have been about as useful as a handful of sand.

I think at this point Ta also caught on, and we understood that we were in an especially akward situation. We hadn't heard about "Pedophiles" at this age but we certainly had been pumped full of enough "Stranger Danger" literature to give us a healthy degree of fear "Thanks public school"

At this point my neighbor came outside, to this day I thank him for that as at once the car drove off at top speed, just like Dale Earnhardt driving down a racetrack.  It's funny because this guy was a bit of a jerk, he'd often make silly complaints that were making too much noise "When my family was rarely at home to begin with" and in general he was a bit of a prick, but he immediately looked at us and at the grey car and yelled "HEY!"

This is where #3 happened, and where I think I realize why this deserves to be in the "Creepypasta" category. I remember a police officer coming to our school to teach us about "Stranger Danger" and how to remember the license. There was no licenseplate there was NO licensplate! Nothing, an empty husk where an identifying number should be.

Me and Ta' proceeded to nod to Nick, my neighbor. To this day I am sad we never thanked him, to be fair my parents thanked him afterwards but I was just too young and too frightened to say anything. I had a key to our home since my parents were out working and we stood guard by the door like tiny Knights, discussing what just occured. It caused quite a hulabaloo in the apartment complex which resorted in me and Ta' having to explain this story in front of a bunch of middle class older folks who pinched our cheeks and tried to coddle us to no end, we were focused on trying to catch the next episode of "South Park".

Maybe I overthink this all, maybe there really were a pair of "rollerblades" in the back of this guys car. But to this day at the age of twenty six I have nightmares about this experience, something seemed very wrong and the lack of a license plate really added to this level of terror . I should add that the Smithtown police were notified and never managed to get any of these men, for all I know they continue to try and capture kids, I don't know, perhaps they truly had rollerblades as I said before. I doubt it.

Something was very wrong that day, I don't believe in god, or the occult but I think somewhere deep inside on an instinctual level my brain and body were telling me "You need to leave NOW".

Anyway let me know what you think and more importantly share your own experiences.

Best, Agrippa Maxentius

[Sir Slash]

I worked for years at the local state mental hospital here in Fla. and the number of Ghost Stories I've heard could fill volumes. The whole place was Creepy HQ especially at night or on dark, dreary days and almost every ward had a "History".

After working elsewhere for 7 years, I came back there to finish out my time with the state and was told by staff there people had been seeing an old white-haired man on one of the back wards. The thing was the whole place now as a Juvenile Justice facility and that ward was all female staff and inmates. There were no males allowed in there. Not even Maintenance or Security.

When they described the man to me, I realized he was an exact match for an old patient of mine that had been killed by another patient not long before I left and not far from that ward. Staff continued to see the old guy on that ward but could never get close enough to ID him. He just wasn't there.

To be sure, I never saw any of this myself. But I know the staff there well enough that they all weren't making it up. And it really scared the shit out of them. And me too.

[LongBlade]

Agrippa, thank God you got out of there.

[JasonPratt]

No pasta in this thread so far, creepy or otherwise. Am disappointed.  >:D

But I suspect those two guys, when they die, are not going to like what comes next. For God knows how long.  >:(

[JasonPratt]

Hmm, trying to think of creepy real life stories. I live in rural West TN, so either not a lot of material or nothing distinctive enough. ;)

I've heard things at second hand, like the TV news crew I was interning with being terrified -- as in, the temperature in the car changed and I could smell their fear -- about going back into a non-descript little tan efficiency house where they had once run a human interest story about it being haunted. Based on that, I don't think they were only having fun with the intern, we were just driving past it by chance when they remembered it and seeing some kind of black cloud with eyes. Creepy but at second hand.


Okay, so, back in the late 70s I learned about Bigfoot for the first time. NATURALLY my friends and I got into the habit of 'looking for Bigfoot' out in the field behind my house sometimes. ;) Also pretty naturally, I got to hearing odd noises outside my bedroom window at night, and being terrified out of my mind that a Bigfoot was stalking me at night.

(I rarely had bad dreams about Bigfoots though -- or whatever the plural should be there  :P -- and I'm someone who has had bad dreams or at least stress dreams for roughly 80% of the time I've been asleep for the past 40 years. Just not due to this.)

Now, before I continue I want to clarify some things:

1.) I never saw the slightest evidence anything was ever outside my window. I mean if I went to go look the next day; I damn well didn't open the curtains to look at night. 

2.) I didn't have the slightest evidence before we started play-looking for Bigfoot that there were any around. Including no stories from other people.

3.) Even as a little boy, I was self-conscious enough to know rationally I was just scaring myself as a side effect, and almost certainly only imagining things. Except I couldn't tell if I was actually imagining sounds outside my window sometimes, or if I was hearing occasional sounds that my imagination was creatively re-interpreting. It didn't always happen, just sometimes, and I knew it tended to happen more often after reading books or whatever on Bigfoot studies (whether scientific like from anthropologist John Green or more pop-folktale in genre).

When I got older and the internet was invented, I learned that while West TN has had a few interesting stories about Bigfoot encounters, mostly the stories happen in Middle TN, or from areas farther away than that in some direction. (Oddly not as many reported in East as in MidTN.) So again, all signs point to a kid being scared by having fun being scared (and being interested in a creepy topic).

Clear? Okay.

So the last time we ever went 'looking for Bigfoot', out in the field behind my house, my best friend S and I happily tromped out to the end of it one summer day, and then happily tromped back -- staying well away from the only tree line, which was a fairly thin but thick run of trees along a fenceline between that field and the one immediately eastward.

On the way back, I got to feeling increasingly like we were being watched. I chalked that up to paranoia from being out looking for Bigfoot, when S sort of choked to a stop in fear and rasped, "Jason!" And pointed.

Immediately to our right, maybe a hundred feet away, the treeline was for some reason more of a tall brushline, no trees, and there in the center of the brush, about a foot or so above our eye level, was an ugly, brown, ape-face. Staring at us. Not moving.

It hadn't been there before.

We watched it. It watched us, or seemed to. We edged past it, and ran for home.

After gathering up some courage, we went back while the sun was still up, staying well away from the treeline, reasoning that if something was there watching us, it apparently didn't want to run out into the middle of the field to get us, or wasn't hostile, just curious.

Face?

Not

there

anymore.

We looked hard (at 100 feet distance, because we weren't entirely stupid.) No face.

Didn't go out looking for Bigfoot anymore.

Now, did we see a stump? Don't know.

I do know that not long afterward, one of the old farmers who liked to gather together in a corner of our local restaurant, came in and told the other guys, "Y'all aren't gonna believe what I saw this morning! A baboon ran across the road and up a tree!"

This year, coincidentally, I was checking around on some sites, and discovered a woman had registered seeing a Bigfoot at Atwood, about 30 miles south south-east of here, back a few years before we saw that face in the brushline.

[undercovergeek]

A looooooooooong time ago, i was maybe 13, 14, went to school as usual, met up with the usual pre lesson bunch to talk about last nights TV or whatever - and two of the regulars were all wild eyed and excited about something'

'you have to come with us, you have to come tonight and see this thing'

'errr ok, what thing?'

'we dont know but you have to come and see it'

The day pans out as normal and at the end of school we head for 'the place'. Its a church yard maybe 3 miles from my parents house, next to a junior school. Surprisingly theres about 40 kids, ranging from 12 ish to 21 ish all have received the same 'call' - you must come and see this thing.

We play football in the school fields next to the church, still not a clue what is going on and what weve come to see. It gets dark, its late autumn, its maybe 19:30 - theres a general nodding of agreement and a hush and then one of the older kids says 'come on - its time'

We all go into the church yard, and theres a cemetery at the back on a split level, about 100 graves and then a solid hedgerow line about 6 feet high with a small gap in the middle for a few stone steps and then a higher level with maybe another 100 graves. Next to the church building itself were two massive stone sarcophogus - enough that 20 of us could sit on each one - with a view across the cemeterys upper level and the gap in the hedge to the lower level

Cue the usual 'woooooooo' sounds from the people that hadnt been last night, and eerie silence from those that had - temperature, climate, both or whatever - the lower portion is all misty and wispy. We wait.......

and wait

and wait.......

'Is someone taking the piss?' pipes up from the back

'Sssssshhhhhhhhh listen' comes from the front - and we all lean forward

'crunch, crunch, crunch' someone is walking in the gravel path on the lower level

'crunch, crunch, crunch'

'what the fuck is it?' someone whispers........

'holy shit - look'

and partway down the 6ft high hedge, nowhere near the gap for the steps, a gap just appears in the leaves and branches as if someone is pushing through from the other side, but theres noone there, we can see the gap, we can see the cemetery on the other side through the gap, and then it just pops shut again, as if whatever came through the bush is now through the bush

'oooooooooooooo fk' someone whispers and everyone gets edgy

'crunch, crunch, crunch'

except the 'crunch, crunch, crunch' is now on the upper level, coming towards us

'ooooooooooooh fuuuuuuuuck, look'

'crunch, crunch, crunch' and with every step is a hollow foot print in the gravel now maybe 60 feet from us and walking towards us

'LEG IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!' and 40 kids run from a churchyard like theyve seen the gates of hell open, i was a chubby fucker then and ran all 3 miles home, with tears on my face, went straight to bed and stared at the celing for 8 hours - didnt sleep for days

it was never mentioned the next day, and ive never been back, and you know what - i dont want to

[BanzaiCat]

Shit, you fuckers. I hadn't thought about this in years and now you gotta stir some shit up...

I remember working late one day at the bookstore at the mall...I was in the back sorting some books, the manager was up front clearing the registers (we were closed), and everything was pretty normal. We were the only ones in the store and I'd worked there for about a year; it was routine, nothing different about that night. I remember getting another several books out of one box and was probably thinking about something totally random (like bewbs or something) and boom, I heard a voice whisper my name.

It was as if it was RIGHT behind me. My heart started doing a good thrash metal impression and the hair on the back of my neck stood straight up, and all my nerve endings were crackling. I must have spun like a ninja warrior - I don't remember turning around, I was getting books, whisper, then boom I'm turned around and feeling absolutely terrified.

My mind tried to process it - it sounded like a woman's voice. Then as rational thought slowly returned, I figured it was one of the women on our staff messing with me. But nobody was in the back room - it's one large-ish room with a bathroom off of it (door was open, bathroom is small, nothing to see there) and then a small side hallway to a back door. And besides, it was just me and my manager closing up that night.

My heart was still hammering even though I was trying to tell myself WTF I just heard. I checked the back door, but nobody was in the hallway (it was long and empty). And besides...the damn voice was literally almost in my ear. I heard it clear as day.

I went up front and looked through the aisles. I looked at the manager, he looked up then did a double take, and he said I was as white as a sheet.

I didn't much like the guy so I just said "thought I heard something" and headed back to the back.

This time I was a little more worried. I stood there for a minute and tried to laugh it off, then said out loud, "Okay, you scared me, congratulations whoever you are." My heart had slowed down a little and I started to get back to work when the manager came back to check on me. I said everything was fine, and he went back up front.

I worked for a few minutes, then was starting to think normal thoughts again (probably bewbs) and then the lights went out.

Now, there was only one switch, right by the door to the front sales floor. It made a loud CLICK when it was turned on and off. It didn't make a click. The lights just fucking went off. And I was in pitch blackness. There were emergency lights up on the wall that were on in darkness...they always came on when we switched the light off in the back...but those didn't come on.

In about 0.05 seconds I was out the door to the front area saying "Nope nope nope nope nope" and what's really freaky is I felt like something was reaching for me. No whispers, no noise, just you know that flight or fight feeling at the back of your brain, like something was reaching for me in the darkness. Probably just my imagination, but holy shit that scared the hell out of me.

The lights WERE turned off, and when the manager came back there he turned them on (and a loud CLICK came on, then he turned them off with another loud CLICK, then on again - CLICK - you get the idea).

He looked at me for about two seconds and said, "Lights go off?"

I just nodded.

I'll always remember him taking a deep breath and saying, "Yeah, that's happened to me a couple of times. You heard it, huh?"

I asked him "heard what?" or something like that.

"There's some creepy shit that goes down back there sometimes early in the morning or late at night."

I told him about the voice whispering my name. He said he never had that happen to him, but he DID here giggling one night, and he thought it was an echo through the vents. He heard it again a few weeks later, the same laughter. He said it happened every so often but it was always the same laugh, and it always sounded like it was coming from a corner of the room and not from the vents or doors.

I told him there was no fucking way I was finishing those books that night, so he went back there and helped me, but fortunately nothing messed with us for the remainder of the evening.

I only worked there for about a month afterwards before moving to work at a new mall much closer to me (the mall I was at was getting overrun by thug and criminal elements...the mall shut down a few years later shortly after a woman was shot to death at a bus stop on the mall's property because nobody wanted to shop at the gunpoint mall...fucking losers, I grew up as a kid going there with my parents). And that never happened again. But I can almost feel the hair on the back of my neck standing up just THINKING about that whisper.

Probably just being over-reactive, but I tried to not be alone in the back again, and when I was it felt like something very amused was watching me the entire time.

[Sir Slash]

Love it. Keep 'em coming.

[Staggerwing]

This one may remind you of the classic dream-within-a-dream trope:

The creepiest (though not most unusual) experience I've ever had was when I was in my 20's. I was dating a nurse at the time and we would spend nights over at each other's places most nights of the week. One night I was having some kind of unsettling dream (the details of which escape me now but must have been more like a nightmare) and I must have disturbed my girlfriend whom I felt rolling over against me, very solid and reassuring. I slightly roused and her physical presence was a welcome relief from whatever horrors I had been experiencing in my dreams. Suddenly, I remembered that she was out of town for a few days and I should have been alone in bed, and whatever was next to me was not her at all, was very strange and somehow unnatural and shouldn't exist...  :o

A  moment later I woke up again, all alone and so thoroughly freaked out that I just stayed awake until morning. Even now the memory of that sudden perception of a presence and it's unnaturalness is very sharp and makes the hair on the back of my neck stand up.

[MikeGER]

THX for your storys  . I have a story (already wrote about it 2009 in an other former wargaming related forum and was able to find my text, so i dont have to retype it all again)  but its not a scary one, ...or at least i was not scared ...at the beginning.

   A few years ago (must be 10 or so now) I was riding my MTB in the woods near my home town, it was maybe 10am, good weather, no fog, normal temperature, no other ppl around, a springtime morning no underbrush already growing.  I came down a hiking path, passing a trail head with tiny parking lot, passing over a junction between two small creeks, when i saw a person  'gliding' behind a beech tree aprox 15m left and 20m in front of my path. I was alarmed, because hiding when a guy on a bike approaches is suspicious. Cause of the parking lot in walking distance, i thought someone is dumping garbage or other illegal activity. I love my "Heimat" very much and i am not afraid to call law enforcement immediately with my cellular strapped to my military grade camelbak if someone dares to f*ck up the places i prowl to relax. So i tracked that tree while i continued my path with reduced speed... but the 'person' didn't came into view ? ...and there was also no additional shadow cast on the ground giving away the person hiding? I stared at that tree fully alert until i had turned my head to the max. Even if that 'person' had spiraled around that tree like squirrels like to do it, and also doing that synchronized to my motion without being able to see me, and also if 'he/she' would have been standing sideways (only with one shoulder against the trunk) to present a smaller silhouette doing that trick... it was gone!  ....when i drove on, ...it suddenly grows on me that the diameter of that tree was way to small for a  'person' to hide behind it ...using any methods i know. I don't know what it was, but i felt no fear at that moment ...was only puzzled.
  A acquaintance (died 2014), who was  interested in all kind of esoteric stuff (doing reki, feng shui, divining rod, gemstones ... u got it), told me that it could have been a 'minor nature deity' which granted a short peek at it caus of my positive 'protecting attitude for its living space' when i came along.
There were also two long time gone "Schleifkotten" (pre-industrial forge and manly grinding hut) once near that place using the creeks waterpower with a mill for manufacturing  maybe starting from the 10th century so there is enuf  room for all kind of 'interpretations'
every time i cycle along this trail now (with slight goosebumps passing that very) spot,  i am double sensitive, but i never saw anything there again.

Scared? well, when i finally had realized that the trunk is just a little bit to small to hide behind ... i was already a quarter of a mile down the track ... well, i dint turned back to investigate! if that had happened in a foreign place, i would have wet my pants, but this are my woods, my ancestors prowled for centuries. Germans love woods and had holy trees (oaks), ponds and springs once... why should those 'spirits' or maybe a 'ghost' of a more or less former relative harm me . yes, it was a 'person'  (3-dimensional, sharp outlines, no translucency), saw it from the side, normal height (1.60-1.70m) more thin than fat, slightly bowed forward like an elderly person not a child, dark clothes.. 'gliding' behind the tree-trunk in a split second

[agrippamaxentius]

Thank you so much guys for sharing, more, more! :D Longblade thanks mate, I guess I was lucky to get out of there but sometimes I think that maybe I was just overthinking it and that the guy was just eccentric, or even having a laugh at our expense with is buddy. Though like you I suspect something much more sinister.

[agrippamaxentius]

No pasta in this thread so far, creepy or otherwise. Am disappointed.  >:D

But I suspect those two guys, when they die, are not going to like what comes next. For God knows how long.  >:(

I certainly hope not :D.

Loved the bigfoot story, the interesting thing is on my KY side of the family I have heard many stories of people claiming they saw a "Swamp Ape" or "Pecos Bill" as my cousin used to call him.  I always love imagining it to be true, even though I have trouble believing in it xD. That being said it's not completely impossible, even the "Thylacines" of Australia eventually learned to hide themselves extremely well, because they knew the danger that human beings posed. Some even suspect that a group of Thylacines still exist, skulking around in the outback somewhere. Personally I would guess one of two things. 1: A person dressing up as a "Bigfoot" with the expressed intent to scare people 2. A rabid, possibly sick/deformed bear "Of course this also goes against all rules of nature as it would be unlikely for him to survive to adulthood.  Although the sheer amount of bigfoot stories certainly lends creedence to the possibility of an "ape man".  If this was a real species I could only assume it to be docile, but powerful. All of the stories I hear involve the bigfoot merely watching, or running away from people. It reminds me very much of the behavior of a gorilla, although extremely powerful they generally won't attack unless you challenge them or their group directly or come too close to their "Grazing" area. Very awesome stuff here, now off to watch some bigfoot docus!

[JasonPratt]

I hear other stories about more aggressive behavior, but still in the sense of territorial bluff -- throwing rocks, charging waving arms, damage to property, etc.

The amount of super-ape stories (broadly speaking) across the world, at least in the northern hemisphere, across human history, is pretty impressive and generally consistent from a folk-anthropological view, and the North American evidence starts early (although passed on through some notoriously unreliable paths) and still continues at a much wider spread than most people are aware of. I was surprised to learn of so much Mid-East and Atlantic Northeast activity a few years ago -- enough so that someone putting the timing together can almost track migration patterns!

The footprints are even better evidence: we've gotten to the point in forensic anthropology that scientists can tell when a print is hard to fake or not, and there are very, VERY good print sets out there on record. Enough so that we can even infer when hoaxers are hoaxing having made a set of prints they didn't hoax! -- their explanations for how they did it simply do not match up with the physical evidence at multiple levels.


An interesting side effect of the growing mound of evidence (much of it spurious or outright faked, admittedly), is an increase in reports of another even-more-disturbing cryptid type that somewhat overlaps Bigfoot characteristics: the bipedal canine. I even know of two different reports of those in the Land Between The Lakes (the area of the TN River which flows into Kentucky from TN.) Nowhere near the same kind of evidence pool as for Bigfoot, but the increase is interesting.

[agrippamaxentius]

I hear other stories about more aggressive behavior, but still in the sense of territorial bluff -- throwing rocks, charging waving arms, damage to property, etc.

The amount of super-ape stories (broadly speaking) across the world, at least in the northern hemisphere, across human history, is pretty impressive and generally consistent from a folk-anthropological view, and the North American evidence starts early (although passed on through some notoriously unreliable paths) and still continues at a much wider spread than most people are aware of. I was surprised to learn of so much Mid-East and Atlantic Northeast activity a few years ago -- enough so that someone putting the timing together can almost track migration patterns!

The footprints are even better evidence: we've gotten to the point in forensic anthropology that scientists can tell when a print is hard to fake or not, and there are very, VERY good print sets out there on record. Enough so that we can even infer when hoaxers are hoaxing having made a set of prints they didn't hoax! -- their explanations for how they did it simply do not match up with the physical evidence at multiple levels.


An interesting side effect of the growing mound of evidence (much of it spurious or outright faked, admittedly), is an increase in reports of another even-more-disturbing cryptid type that somewhat overlaps Bigfoot characteristics: the bipedal canine. I even know of two different reports of those in the Land Between The Lakes (the area of the TN River which flows into Kentucky from TN.) Nowhere near the same kind of evidence pool as for Bigfoot, but the increase is interesting.

Very interesting I want to look into this. I must admit if I saw a bipedal canine I would be stuck in the akward position of wanting to laugh hysterically, yet being unbelievably creeped out at the same time.

[Gusington]

How the hell did I miss this thread?? I live for this. Must collect my thoughts, give proper time to read the above and then post my best.