Florida deserves its own thread

Started by besilarius, September 18, 2015, 06:50:21 AM

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besilarius

"Most gods throw dice, but Fate plays chess, and you don't find out until too late that he's been playing with two queens all along".  Terry Pratchett.

During filming of Airplane, Leslie Nielsen used a whoopee cushion to keep the cast off-balance. Hays said that Nielsen "played that thing like a maestro"

Tallulah Bankhead: "I'll come and make love to you at five o'clock. If I'm late, start without me."

"When all other trusts fail, turn to Flashman." — Abraham Lincoln.

"I have enjoyed very warm relations with my two husbands."
"With your eyes closed?"
"That helped."  Lauren Bacall

Master Chiefs are sneaky, dastardly, and snarky miscreants who thrive on the tears of Ensigns and belly dancers.   Admiral Gerry Bogan.

besilarius

https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation-now/2018/07/16/florida-man-faked-his-murder-using-gun-and-weather-balloon/787566002/

Didn't Conan Doyle write a Sherlock Homes story with this plot?  IIRC, he had the suicide weapon fall from a bridge into the water.
"Most gods throw dice, but Fate plays chess, and you don't find out until too late that he's been playing with two queens all along".  Terry Pratchett.

During filming of Airplane, Leslie Nielsen used a whoopee cushion to keep the cast off-balance. Hays said that Nielsen "played that thing like a maestro"

Tallulah Bankhead: "I'll come and make love to you at five o'clock. If I'm late, start without me."

"When all other trusts fail, turn to Flashman." — Abraham Lincoln.

"I have enjoyed very warm relations with my two husbands."
"With your eyes closed?"
"That helped."  Lauren Bacall

Master Chiefs are sneaky, dastardly, and snarky miscreants who thrive on the tears of Ensigns and belly dancers.   Admiral Gerry Bogan.

Sir Slash

Also now a really great way to commit murder and blame it on suicide with a weather balloon.  #:-)
"Take a look at that". Sgt. Wilkerson-- CMBN. His last words after spotting a German tank on the other side of a hedgerow.

Gusington

Florida Man, whoever he is, is one busy dude.


слава Україна!

We can't live under the threat of a c*nt because he's threatening nuclear Armageddon.

-JudgeDredd


Sir Slash

Brevard County doesn't count as part of Florida. We've tried to give them to Cuba and the Bahamas but nobody will take them. Now you know why.  :idiot2:   Just for the record, turtles can be trained to serve cold drinks on their backs and spy on your neighbors for you but cannot be trained to attack anyone. At least not quickly enough to catch-up to them. Carry on.
"Take a look at that". Sgt. Wilkerson-- CMBN. His last words after spotting a German tank on the other side of a hedgerow.

airboy

Quote from: Sir Slash on April 12, 2019, 10:49:50 AM
Brevard County doesn't count as part of Florida. We've tried to give them to Cuba and the Bahamas but nobody will take them. Now you know why.  :idiot2:   Just for the record, turtles can be trained to serve cold drinks on their backs and spy on your neighbors for you but cannot be trained to attack anyone. At least not quickly enough to catch-up to them. Carry on.

How are 'turtle spies" trained?  How do turtle spies evade our canine guardians?  My canine guardians "search and annoy" turtles every time they can get their paws around one.  The turtle spy goes into "shutdown mode" which prevents spying, but causes great annoyance to my canine guards. 

Sir Slash

The properly equipped ones have little cameras in their butts. Dogs never think to check there.  ::)
"Take a look at that". Sgt. Wilkerson-- CMBN. His last words after spotting a German tank on the other side of a hedgerow.

Gusington

Slash The Wife and I are flying to Miami and then driving to the Keys tomorrow. Where are you?


слава Україна!

We can't live under the threat of a c*nt because he's threatening nuclear Armageddon.

-JudgeDredd

Sir Slash

No where real close, about 100 miles north of Miami and over by the west coast. Arcadia is the town, in Desoto County. Miami Airport is a bear BTW, hope one of you speaks Spanish fluently. The Keys are great. Great place to vacation.  O0
"Take a look at that". Sgt. Wilkerson-- CMBN. His last words after spotting a German tank on the other side of a hedgerow.

Gusington

I've just been notified that we are flying in to Ft. Lauderdale, not Miami.

Probably because we don't speak Spanish.


слава Україна!

We can't live under the threat of a c*nt because he's threatening nuclear Armageddon.

-JudgeDredd

Sir Slash

SPRING BREAK!!! :D  Hope you brought your thong. And, lots of cash. We so appreciate that here.
"Take a look at that". Sgt. Wilkerson-- CMBN. His last words after spotting a German tank on the other side of a hedgerow.

Gusington

I never go anywhere without my thong. I don't remember who it belonged to, originally.

Almost there. Plane is packed with little kids under 5, but I have to say...they are all the most well behaved kids I have ever seen. I lucked out this time.

Their parents are so strict too, all of them. Didn't think people like this still existed.


слава Україна!

We can't live under the threat of a c*nt because he's threatening nuclear Armageddon.

-JudgeDredd

Sir Slash

WHAT are you drinking? Tell me, I want some.
"Take a look at that". Sgt. Wilkerson-- CMBN. His last words after spotting a German tank on the other side of a hedgerow.

DoctorQuest

The real question is: "What are the kids drinking?"
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