https://iheartintelligence.com/more-intelligent-people-are-heavier-drinkers-studies-say
People who drink aren't smarter than everyone else, they just think they are. And tell you about it. Often. And loudly. Until you agree. Or sneak away when they're trying to make a coherent point. I know this because the guy at the bar told me while explaining to me how you can make a spaceship out of old beer cans and swears we were childhood friends while calling me by the wrong name. I just tell the bartender, 'I'll have whatever he's drinking'.