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IRL (In Real Life) => Current Events => Topic started by: bayonetbrant on January 03, 2014, 10:08:57 AM

Title: Not The Way I Want To Go Out
Post by: bayonetbrant on January 03, 2014, 10:08:57 AM
Kim Jong Un's executed uncle was eaten alive by 120 hungry dogs: report (http://worldnews.nbcnews.com/_news/2014/01/03/22156917-kim-jong-uns-executed-uncle-was-eaten-alive-by-120-hungry-dogs-report)

QuoteNorth Korean leader Kim Jong Un's powerful uncle was stripped naked, thrown into a cage, and eaten alive by a pack of ravenous dogs, according to a newspaper with close ties to China's ruling Communist Party.

The report could not be independently confirmed by NBC News on Friday.
Jang Song Thaek, who had been considered Kim's second-in-command, was executed last month after being found guilty of "attempting to overthrow the state," North Korea's state-run news agency reported.

The official North Korean account on Dec. 12 did not specify how Jang was put to death.

Hong Kong-based pro-Beijing newspaper Wen Wei Po reported that Jang and his five closest aides were set upon by 120 hunting hounds which had been starved for five days.

Kim and his brother Kim Jong Chol supervised the one-hour ordeal along with 300 other officials, according to Wen Wei Po. The newspaper added that Jang and other aides were "completely eaten up."

The newspaper has acted as a mouthpiece for China's Communist Party. The report may be a sign of the struggle between those in the party who want to remain engaged with North Korea and those who would like to distance themselves from Kim's regime.

Jang was seen by many experts as a regent behind North Korea's Kim dynasty and a key connection between the hermit nation and its ally China.

In the highly scripted execution, North Korea accused him of "attempting to overthrow the state by all sorts of intrigues and despicable methods with a wild ambition to grab the supreme power of our party and state."

Kim's government also accused him of of corruption, womanizing, gambling and taking drugs, and referred to him as "despicable human scum."

Jang was married to Kim's aunt, Kim Kyong Hui, the younger sister of Kim Jong Il.
Title: Re: Not The Way I Want To Go Out
Post by: LongBlade on January 03, 2014, 10:13:25 AM
It's a dog eat dog world.
Title: Re: Not The Way I Want To Go Out
Post by: mirth on January 03, 2014, 10:15:50 AM
Uncle Jang wanted to be Top Dog. Now he's gone to the dogs.
Title: Re: Not The Way I Want To Go Out
Post by: mirth on January 03, 2014, 10:17:14 AM
Honestly I'm kinda surprised there are 120 dogs left in NK. Figured the Norks would have eaten them all a long time ago.
Title: Re: Not The Way I Want To Go Out
Post by: LongBlade on January 03, 2014, 10:50:16 AM
Quote from: mirth on January 03, 2014, 10:17:14 AM
Honestly I'm kinda surprised there are 120 dogs left in NK. Figured the Norks would have eaten them all a long time ago.

The un-cola has to have a strategic reserve held back somewhere. I think we just found it.
Title: Re: Not The Way I Want To Go Out
Post by: mirth on January 03, 2014, 10:58:40 AM
In other news, Michael Vick has decided to adopt a North Korean hunting dog.
Title: Re: Not The Way I Want To Go Out
Post by: Con on January 03, 2014, 11:07:40 AM
So far the count for executions Under Lil Kim

1. Tethered a General to an aiming marker and then mortared him into oblivion
2. Machine gunned his ex girl friend and a doze other singers for supposedly being in pornos (apparently they showed some ankle)
3. And now fed his uncle and five others to dogs

I am thinking that he has hired Brick Top from Snatch as a consultant?

I think the next execution will involve Dennis Rodman somehow...maybe exanguination through tattooing and piercing

Con
Title: Re: Not The Way I Want To Go Out
Post by: LongBlade on January 03, 2014, 11:09:34 AM
I worry about Rodman. He's pals with a psychopath.
Title: Re: Not The Way I Want To Go Out
Post by: bayonetbrant on January 03, 2014, 11:24:46 AM
Quote from: Con on January 03, 2014, 11:07:40 AMI think the next execution will involve Dennis Rodman somehow...maybe exanguination through tattooing and piercing

Already done
North Korea Executes Dennis Rodman (http://www.duffelblog.com/2013/12/north-korea-executes-dennis-rodman/)
Title: Re: Not The Way I Want To Go Out
Post by: GDS_Starfury on January 03, 2014, 11:34:06 AM
Quote from: LongBlade on January 03, 2014, 11:09:34 AM
I worry about Rodman. He's pals with a psychopath.

nah, his camera crew are all spooks.
Title: Re: Not The Way I Want To Go Out
Post by: Shelldrake on January 03, 2014, 11:41:22 AM
Quote from: Con on January 03, 2014, 11:07:40 AM
So far the count for executions Under Lil Kim

1. Tethered a General to an aiming marker and then mortared him into oblivion
2. Machine gunned his ex girl friend and a doze other singers for supposedly being in pornos (apparently they showed some ankle)
3. And now fed his uncle and five others to dogs

I am thinking that he has hired Brick Top from Snatch as a consultant?

I think the next execution will involve Dennis Rodman somehow...maybe exanguination through tattooing and piercing

Con

Hard to believe but NK is starting to make Nazi Germany look tame!
Title: Re: Not The Way I Want To Go Out
Post by: BanzaiCat on January 03, 2014, 11:45:16 AM
I gotta hand it to them, they don't paws to think about ruff treatment of prisoners.
Title: Re: Not The Way I Want To Go Out
Post by: LongBlade on January 03, 2014, 11:53:29 AM
Quote from: GDS_Starfury on January 03, 2014, 11:34:06 AM
Quote from: LongBlade on January 03, 2014, 11:09:34 AM
I worry about Rodman. He's pals with a psychopath.

nah, his camera crew are all spooks.

I think once you step off the plane in NK your fate lies in the un-cola's hands.
Title: Re: Not The Way I Want To Go Out
Post by: mirth on January 03, 2014, 12:03:31 PM
Quote from: bayonetbrant on January 03, 2014, 11:24:46 AM
Quote from: Con on January 03, 2014, 11:07:40 AMI think the next execution will involve Dennis Rodman somehow...maybe exanguination through tattooing and piercing

Already done
North Korea Executes Dennis Rodman (http://www.duffelblog.com/2013/12/north-korea-executes-dennis-rodman/)

once again Duffel Blog shows us the way.
Title: Re: Not The Way I Want To Go Out
Post by: Airborne Rifles on January 03, 2014, 01:04:08 PM
Quote from: mirth on January 03, 2014, 10:17:14 AM
Honestly I'm kinda surprised there are 120 dogs left in NK. Figured the Norks would have eaten them all a long time ago.

Well, they were hungry dogs apparently...

Seriously, what a weird little country...with nukes.
Title: Re: Not The Way I Want To Go Out
Post by: Con on January 03, 2014, 01:06:19 PM
I guess the sharks with frikkin laser beams were on back order again

Con
Title: Re: Not The Way I Want To Go Out
Post by: GDS_Starfury on January 03, 2014, 02:29:13 PM
functioning lasers are a restricted technology to import into NK.
Title: Re: Not The Way I Want To Go Out
Post by: LongBlade on January 03, 2014, 02:39:05 PM
I watched World War Z the other night.

One of the less appreciated comedic moments was when they were explaining how the norks survived the zombie outbreak: they immediately pulled the teeth of everyone in the country.

The thing is, that's probably exactly what they'd do.
Title: Re: Not The Way I Want To Go Out
Post by: GDS_Starfury on January 03, 2014, 02:45:29 PM
^^^  I did like that part.  with any other title it would have been an ok movie.

Im still hoping it gets the HBO mini series for the the book.
Title: Re: Not The Way I Want To Go Out
Post by: Centurion40 on January 07, 2014, 10:49:09 AM
Quote from: mirth on January 03, 2014, 10:17:14 AM
Honestly I'm kinda surprised there are 120 dogs left in NK. Figured the Norks would have eaten them all a long time ago.

Which explains why the story is pure bunk.
Title: Re: Not The Way I Want To Go Out
Post by: Mr. Bigglesworth on January 16, 2014, 12:17:57 PM
Quote from: Banzai_Cat on January 03, 2014, 11:45:16 AM
I gotta hand it to them, they don't paws to think about ruff treatment of prisoners.

Woof.