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He who dares

Started by GDS_Starfury, July 30, 2013, 01:21:32 PM

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GDS_Starfury

#15
July 30, 2013, 07:43:53 PM
Its Bel... he gas a sea story for everything.
Jarhead - Yeah. You're probably right.

Gus - I use sweatpants with flannel shorts to soak up my crotch sweat.

Banzai Cat - There is no "partial credit" in grammar. Like anal sex. It's either in, or it's not.

Mirth - We learned long ago that they key isn't to outrun Star, it's to outrun Gus.

Martok - I don't know if it's possible to have an "anti-boner"...but I now have one.

Gus - Celery is vile and has no reason to exist. Like underwear on Star.

besilarius

#16
July 30, 2013, 08:42:12 PM
Star, you know the difference between a fairy tale and a sea story?
A Fairy tale begins, "Once upon a time".  A sea story begins, "I just heard the captain talking to the XO and this is a no-shitter."

Had a friend, Larry Tuohy who told this story.  He was an engineer and was working out of Da Nang.  Early in the war, maybe 1968, he was waiting for an assignment in the repple-depple next to MACV headquarters.  A truck driver came in and asked if anyone wanted to get out of town for a bit.  He had a load to take out to the boonies.
Larry thought anything was better than sitting, waiting so he went along.  The truck was already loaded, and he came up short.  On the truck was not a carton, not a case, but a pallet load of Foster's Lager.  Foster's was available by the bottle in town, but to see a pallet?  Where was this going?
Oh, out to an old French rubber plantation, said the driver.  (This might get him some free Fosters, so the trip was looking better and better.)
So, they drove out of Da Nang, out into the security zone, and then on.  Larry was no getting a little concerned.  Is this okay?  Don't the VC bother you.
Nope, they never paid any attention to this supply truck.
Finally, they pulled up the path to a rubber plantaion house, and on the porch were four strapping guys, drinking Fosters.
Larry was a little confused by all these developments.  Turned out the four guys were Australian SAS.  The Fosters were sent each week by one of their moms.  A pallet load of Fosters for four guys every week.
He asked, what are you doing out here?  They told him, that at night, they crossed into Laos, occasionally Cambodia, and looked for VC supply columns.  The VC porters each had a bike, which was loaded with a huge amount of supplies.  The normal column might have forty or fifty porters.
The SAS guys would follow the column until there was a bend in the trail and the last guy was out of sight.  Then they would kill him with silenced weapons.  They'd pull him into the jungle grass with his bike, and then stalk the next guy in the column. 
They liked to kill all the porters except for the lead man.  This guy would report to the logistics officer that the rest had disappeared.
The Aussies thought this was a great joke.
Don't they ever, you know, come in and attack the plantation?
One of those strapping six footers covered his mouth and tee - hee'd like a little girl.
"Oh, they tried that a few times.  Naow they leave us alowne."
"Most gods throw dice, but Fate plays chess, and you don't find out until too late that he's been playing with two queens all along".  Terry Pratchett.

During filming of Airplane, Leslie Nielsen used a whoopee cushion to keep the cast off-balance. Hays said that Nielsen "played that thing like a maestro"

Tallulah Bankhead: "I'll come and make love to you at five o'clock. If I'm late, start without me."

"When all other trusts fail, turn to Flashman." — Abraham Lincoln.

"I have enjoyed very warm relations with my two husbands."
"With your eyes closed?"
"That helped."  Lauren Bacall

Master Chiefs are sneaky, dastardly, and snarky miscreants who thrive on the tears of Ensigns and belly dancers.   Admiral Gerry Bogan.

Mr. Bigglesworth

#17
July 30, 2013, 08:45:06 PM
LOL good story.
"Once more unto the breach, dear friends, once more; "
- Shakespeare's Henry V, Act III, 1598

GDS_Starfury

#18
July 30, 2013, 08:52:09 PM
I knew ya had one.  :)
Jarhead - Yeah. You're probably right.

Gus - I use sweatpants with flannel shorts to soak up my crotch sweat.

Banzai Cat - There is no "partial credit" in grammar. Like anal sex. It's either in, or it's not.

Mirth - We learned long ago that they key isn't to outrun Star, it's to outrun Gus.

Martok - I don't know if it's possible to have an "anti-boner"...but I now have one.

Gus - Celery is vile and has no reason to exist. Like underwear on Star.

LongBlade

#19
July 30, 2013, 09:14:24 PM
Ha!

Great story. Thanks :)
All that is gold does not glitter,
Not all those who wander are lost;
The old that is strong does not wither,
Deep roots are not reached by the frost.

TheCommandTent

#20
July 30, 2013, 10:07:14 PM
You really should write a book with all these great stories.
"No wants, no needs, we weren't meant for that, none of us.  Man stagnates if he has no ambition, no desire to be more than he is."

Steelgrave

#21
July 31, 2013, 12:40:52 AM
Great thread, great story and funnier than hell. Some times you guys are really on the funny bone. ;D

Boggit

#22
July 31, 2013, 07:45:29 AM
Quote from: Steelgrave on July 31, 2013, 12:40:52 AM
Great thread, great story and funnier than hell. Some times you guys are really on the funny bone. ;D
+1
The most shocking fact about war is that its victims and its instruments are individual human beings, and that these individual beings are condemned by the monstrous conventions of politics to murder or be murdered in quarrels not their own. Aldous Huxley

Foul Temptress! (Mirth replying to Gus) ;)

On a good day, our legislature has the prestige of a drunk urinating on a wall at 4am and getting most of it on his shoe. On a good day  ::) Steelgrave

It's kind of silly to investigate whether or not a Clinton is lying. That's sort of like investigating why the sky is blue. Banzai_Cat

Centurion40

#23
July 31, 2013, 08:00:46 AM
Quote from: GDS_Starfury on July 30, 2013, 01:21:32 PM
WINS!!!

another great job by the SAS.

http://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/news/uk-world-news/special-forces-operation-hailed-sas-2101028

Great story.

Quote
"And this shows why an element of British and American special forces may remain in Afghanistan long after the regular troops have gone home."

Probably a good idea, and a good practice environment for special forces troops.
Any time is a good time for pie.

LongBlade

#24
July 31, 2013, 08:06:06 AM
Quote from: Centurion40 on July 31, 2013, 08:00:46 AM
Quote from: GDS_Starfury on July 30, 2013, 01:21:32 PM
Quote
"And this shows why an element of British and American special forces may remain in Afghanistan long after the regular troops have gone home."

Probably a good idea, and a good practice environment for special forces troops.

I read that, too.

However, the US is more likely to pursue a course of action similar to that in Iraq. Therefore, don't count on us keeping a single soldier there.

There is a case to be made for the US to pick up all its marbles and take them home, allowing the world to fall into whatever chaos it so chooses. However, this president has not made that case, and I do not believe he understands the full extent of what consequences might fall out of a half-baked foreign policy.
All that is gold does not glitter,
Not all those who wander are lost;
The old that is strong does not wither,
Deep roots are not reached by the frost.

Centurion40

#25
July 31, 2013, 08:15:43 AM
I'd say that, so long as a friendly government is in power (that would invite the ongoing military support of its NATO & other allies), and so long as the special forces have a secure base from which to operate; then our special forces troops should be deployed to engage in operations; at the discretion of each respective head of state.
Any time is a good time for pie.

GDS_Starfury

#26
July 31, 2013, 08:53:30 AM
that pretty much precludes us keeping troops in A-stan.
Jarhead - Yeah. You're probably right.

Gus - I use sweatpants with flannel shorts to soak up my crotch sweat.

Banzai Cat - There is no "partial credit" in grammar. Like anal sex. It's either in, or it's not.

Mirth - We learned long ago that they key isn't to outrun Star, it's to outrun Gus.

Martok - I don't know if it's possible to have an "anti-boner"...but I now have one.

Gus - Celery is vile and has no reason to exist. Like underwear on Star.

Centurion40

#27
July 31, 2013, 09:02:36 AM
"Secure" is a relative term.  ::)
Any time is a good time for pie.

Windigo

#28
August 08, 2013, 03:37:33 PM
this one time... at the navy's band camp...

My doctor wrote me a prescription for daily sex.

My wife insists that it says dyslexia but what does she know.

Mr. Bigglesworth

#29
August 09, 2013, 09:52:39 PM
Quote from: Windigo on August 08, 2013, 03:37:33 PM
this one time... at the navy's band camp...

Windy pulled out his flute, offering it to others. "Try mine!"
"Once more unto the breach, dear friends, once more; "
- Shakespeare's Henry V, Act III, 1598
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