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Started by skeptical.platypus, April 29, 2014, 04:01:45 PM

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skeptical.platypus

April 29, 2014, 04:01:45 PM
After a series of increasingly improbable coincidences not entirely unrelated to grogheads, I had to order a new smartphone at roughly 1:30am this morning.

Amazon is delivering a new smartphone for me by 8:00pm today, for $3.99.

I am staggered that it is even possible, let alone financially plausible that there is an apparatus in place that can deliver a fantastically complex device to my doorstep in 18 hours, at a moments notice.
The Law of Unintended Consequences, Seattle Pride Variant: The only city on the planet that can guarantee your purchase of recreational marijuana is from a stoner making $15/hr.

Airborne Rifles

#1
April 29, 2014, 04:06:01 PM
"What a fascinating modern age we live in..." - Jack Aubrey

bob48

#2
April 29, 2014, 04:18:43 PM
^LOL

The Jack Aubrey books are some of the most read in my library, I never get tired of them.
'We few, we happy few, we band of brothers'

'Clip those corners'

Recombobulate the discombobulators!

Steelgrave

#3
April 29, 2014, 04:21:14 PM
Quote from: Airborne Rifles on April 29, 2014, 04:06:01 PM
"What a fascinating modern age we live in..." - Jack Aubrey

+1 and another +1 simply for style.

skeptical.platypus

#4
April 29, 2014, 05:09:31 PM
Dear Mr. Aubrey,

In case you are as fascinated by this as I am, the phone left the seller's facility at 2:33pm pst. I rather imagine I won't get it until 7-8pm, as I am very proximate to a number of local transportation facilities, and am almost certain to be delivered on the way back to their base. That those facilities are on farmland to rival the Willamette Valley is besides the point.

Please give my regards to the French in your usual manner, though I should warn you a bunch of Monty Brits largely improved on it in the late 20th century.

Yours Truly,
splaty
The Law of Unintended Consequences, Seattle Pride Variant: The only city on the planet that can guarantee your purchase of recreational marijuana is from a stoner making $15/hr.

skeptical.platypus

#5
April 29, 2014, 06:34:01 PM
Ordered at 1:25am, delivered at 4:26pm.

The package has a return address of the Amazon Fulfillment Center in Las Vegas. Final delivery was via ontrac. It looks like the 2:33 notification I got was from another carrier's facility (ups is my guess) in south seattle, as Ontrac's website has a data entry, arrival, and out for delivery tag all between 2:37 and 3:24. An hour after that, it arrives.

I fart in Putin's clearly inferior direction.
The Law of Unintended Consequences, Seattle Pride Variant: The only city on the planet that can guarantee your purchase of recreational marijuana is from a stoner making $15/hr.

Staggerwing

#6
April 29, 2014, 07:05:06 PM
Something tells me Putin's new smartphone would arrive quickly as well.

Ivan Q. Public's? Not so much...
Vituð ér enn - eða hvat?  -Voluspa

Nothing really rocks and nothing really rolls and nothing's ever worth the cost...

"Don't you look at me that way..." -the Abyss
 
'When searching for a meaningful embrace, sometimes my self respect took second place' -Iggy Pop, Cry for Love

... this will go down on your permanent record... -the Violent Femmes, 'Kiss Off'-

"I'm not just anyone, I'm not just anyone-
I got my time machine, got my 'electronic dream!"
-Sonic Reducer, -Dead Boys

GDS_Starfury

#7
April 29, 2014, 07:26:45 PM
so wheres the Grogheads angle?
Jarhead - Yeah. You're probably right.

Gus - I use sweatpants with flannel shorts to soak up my crotch sweat.

Banzai Cat - There is no "partial credit" in grammar. Like anal sex. It's either in, or it's not.

Mirth - We learned long ago that they key isn't to outrun Star, it's to outrun Gus.

Martok - I don't know if it's possible to have an "anti-boner"...but I now have one.

Gus - Celery is vile and has no reason to exist. Like underwear on Star.

skeptical.platypus

#8
April 29, 2014, 10:34:12 PM
^I traded my old phone for bacon.

Actually, I spilled cleaning product all over my old phone when I turned sharply left to chase down two monitors sold on Craigslist. Which, as you may recall, was suggested to me on another thread. (Not the spilling cleaning product part.)
The Law of Unintended Consequences, Seattle Pride Variant: The only city on the planet that can guarantee your purchase of recreational marijuana is from a stoner making $15/hr.

GDS_Starfury

#9
April 29, 2014, 11:01:41 PM
do I dare ask why you have "cleaning product" on your desk to begin with?
Jarhead - Yeah. You're probably right.

Gus - I use sweatpants with flannel shorts to soak up my crotch sweat.

Banzai Cat - There is no "partial credit" in grammar. Like anal sex. It's either in, or it's not.

Mirth - We learned long ago that they key isn't to outrun Star, it's to outrun Gus.

Martok - I don't know if it's possible to have an "anti-boner"...but I now have one.

Gus - Celery is vile and has no reason to exist. Like underwear on Star.

Gusington

#10
April 30, 2014, 07:38:16 AM
Monitors equals high class female escorts?
✡

слава Україна!

We can't live under the threat of a c*nt because he's threatening nuclear Armageddon.

-JudgeDredd

skeptical.platypus

#11
April 30, 2014, 08:26:38 AM
Quote from: GDS_Starfury on April 29, 2014, 11:01:41 PM
do I dare ask why you have "cleaning product" on your desk to begin with?

The path to righteousness begins with comfortable footwear and a clean pair of shorts.
The Law of Unintended Consequences, Seattle Pride Variant: The only city on the planet that can guarantee your purchase of recreational marijuana is from a stoner making $15/hr.

skeptical.platypus

#12
April 30, 2014, 08:35:33 AM
Quote from: Gusington on April 30, 2014, 07:38:16 AM
Monitors equals high class female escorts?

Lenovo Elite and LGisha Dinero are my top earners.
The Law of Unintended Consequences, Seattle Pride Variant: The only city on the planet that can guarantee your purchase of recreational marijuana is from a stoner making $15/hr.

Gusington

#13
April 30, 2014, 09:53:36 AM
HA hawt
✡

слава Україна!

We can't live under the threat of a c*nt because he's threatening nuclear Armageddon.

-JudgeDredd

bayonetbrant

#14
April 30, 2014, 11:05:01 AM
The key to surviving this site is to not say something which ends up as someone's tag line - Steelgrave

"their citizens (all of them counted as such) glorified their mythology of 'rights'...and lost track of their duties. No nation, so constituted, can endure." Robert Heinlein, Starship Troopers
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