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Canadian Satire?!

Started by bayonetbrant, July 13, 2013, 08:00:43 PM

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bayonetbrant

July 13, 2013, 08:00:43 PM
Who knew the Canadians had a sense of humor?!?!


QuoteParrot removed from Montreal Biodome after learning too much English

MONTREAL - The Montreal Biodome's Scarlet macaw will be deported to the Toronto Zoo next Friday after she only spoke English during a government inspection.

The parrot - known as "Bouton" - was the star attraction at the Tropical Ecosystem exhibit and very popular with tourists. 

Chief of Animal Compliance at the Office Québecoise de la Langue Française Florence Laplante conducted two surprise visits to the Montreal attraction last week.

"On both occasions, Bouton only spoke to visitors in English," said Lachance. "She asked for crackers, not craquelins." Lachance continued: "Bouton also violated OQLF rules about French being the official language of the workplace. The presence of unilingual animals excludes many québecois birds from pursuing jobs in this sector."

Polly's trainer, Jacques Delorme tried to take matters into his own hands by creating a French immersion course in a bid to stave off her deportation. "Every night, we made Bouton listen to 'Star Académie' and audiobooks about Lucien Bouchard," Delorme explained. "However, these efforts were in vain."

Bouton's replacement, Marie-Eve, a Francophone Spectacled parrotlet arrives from Fossambault-sur-le-Lac next week.

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there's plenty more
The key to surviving this site is to not say something which ends up as someone's tag line - Steelgrave

"their citizens (all of them counted as such) glorified their mythology of 'rights'...and lost track of their duties. No nation, so constituted, can endure." Robert Heinlein, Starship Troopers

Martok

#1
July 14, 2013, 12:41:30 AM


"Like we need an excuse to drink to anything..." - Banzai_Cat
"I like to think of it not as an excuse but more like Pavlovian Response." - Sir Slash

"At our ages, they all look like jailbait." - mirth

"If we had lines here that would have crossed all of them. For the 1,077,986th time." - Gusington

"Government is so expensive that it should at least be entertaining." - airboy

"As long as there's bacon, everything will be all right." - Toonces

endfire79

#2
July 14, 2013, 09:40:03 AM
That made me spew out some coffee this morning.  Well done lol!

Although its satire (read disclaimer http://www.thebeaverton.com/disclaimer) I wouldn't be surprised if it happened for real one day.  The current PQ provincial govt does their best to annoy the hell out of us.

"I will return before you can say 'antidisestablishmentarianism'."

"A man may fight for many things. His country, his principles, his friends. The glistening tear on the cheek of a golden child. But personally, I'd mud-wrestle my own mother for a ton of cash, an amusing clock and a sack of French porn."
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